Hey David Bowie! Talk about cha cha cha changes! The US Chamber of Commerce has petitioned the federal government to officially change the name of Black Friday to Black Thanksgiving Night at Midnight or BT@M. The petition that is being spearheaded by US senator Herb Kohl is designed, in his words, "to ensure that lazy assed people won't have to get out of bed too damn early. They can just stay up." Coincedentally Kohl's department stores has announced that they will be opening at Mid Night.
People what does this say about America? To me it says "lazy assed people, who won't get out of bed." Wait a minute, that's what Herb just said. What I meant to say was "If it's good enough for the Walton's then it's good enough for everyone". Well what I really meant to say was why the hell do you have to ruin BF? I am grossly disappointed with the move away from "get up get out " to "stay up stay out".
T-G has normally been a day of eating too much and then eating some more. Sleeping it off on the couch will watching Wizard of OZ or something. Going to bed at 9 or 10 and then getting up before the crack of dawn and flying out the door. Rushing to J C Penney's to get Rory's damn snow globe before they are all gone! Gone.... All of it ....... gone! Do you know what it does? It sucks that's what it does.
All my research on parking lots and traffic flows.... Gone! My hours of study on light refraction through tinted cars windows at dawn.... Gone! The migration and scatological habits of the Canadian Goose as it relates to slipping and falling in parking lots!..... Gone!!!!!! My studies on the cumulative effects of caffeine on the nervous system...... Gone! My study on the deleterious effect of "Pot O' Gold"..... Gone!!!!! My brief nights sleep.......... GONZO baby! Now is the time when all good people buy cases of "5 Hour Energy" and hope for the best!
Cheers
UB
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